Thursday, November 3, 2011

Playtime and meditation in Fall

So it's fall and in Texas that means it's outside weather! We are not living in a gigantic oven anymore, there is coolness to the air and the ever present sun is still shining everyday. I love it. This is why I moved here 5.5 yrs ago. Now we can talk walks outside with out heat exhaustion! I've been feeling kind of weird through this transistion of season, very disconnected but yearning to be grounded again. It all and always comes down to the distractions we have. We have so many computers and gadgets and tv's it's so easy for us to be doing 10 things at once. Dont get me wrong, I love my Facebook. It keeps me connected to all the other families out there with a child with Angelman Syndrome. They are my support group and my family. But I need to keep perspective and I dont need to be checking every second of the day if they have posted updates. This time of year I start to feel the desire to be more connected to our earth, maybe since I was born in October. so now instead of watching TV when the girls are napping, I will meditate, listen to wind in the trees, the cars going down the street, the creak of our house settling in for the cold weather.

Being a mother up to this time has been fantastic and continues to be. D is almost potty trained, I is learning to crawl, sit up and eat baby food, and C is his happy crazy self as always. I am constantly challenged by them to do better and learn more. It's so weird how this life that I've had continues to be so hard yet so fulfilling at the same time.

Life gets so crazy for us sometimes. Hubby has been self-employed since I met him. This kind of employment is not easy and not for everyone. You have to be resourceful. Money does not always come in regular intervals like for employees of a business. You have to wait for money, or you gets tons of it in one big bunch but then you dont always know when the next bunch is coming. This lifestyle has made me resourceful to say the least, I know how to stretch a dollar, and we know how to budget to big bunches to make it last until the next. It has also taught me what's really important. Some people seem to think it's better for a family to have steady money coming in and more money than you may need. Although it does make life easier to have more money, I dont think it makes it better. Life should be great with or with out lots of money. I definitely appreciate having money and lots of stuff to buy. In fact I love shopping, going to store and buying fun stuff to bring home. But I know for sure my families happiness has nothing to do with whether we can buy stuff or not. I actually really love this. I hope my kids see how we are living our dreams and always make the best of whatever our situation is. I hope they never see us stress over money, and they see us work hard for everything we have. I know they will never see my husband and I fight over money. I know we do get stressed from it here and there but there is never a doubt we will be ok. And I hope my kids grow up knowing if they follow their dreams they can make any situation happy.

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